


I Can't Help Falling In Love With You

by becausefeels



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Actor Niall, Kid Fic, M/M, Older Lads, Post-Canon, tags tags relevant tags
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-06
Updated: 2015-06-06
Packaged: 2018-04-03 03:16:56
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 17,915
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4084609
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/becausefeels/pseuds/becausefeels
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>One Direction's been over for ten years. Zayn left fourteen years ago. Niall's made a life for himself doing small films with Irish directors. He's doing alright, all things considered.</p>
<p>But he still misses his boys.</p>
<p>Or, One Direction reunites for a charity concert and things do not go according to plan.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I Can't Help Falling In Love With You

**Author's Note:**

> I'm so proud of myself for finishing this fic. maybe next I can work on that hogwarts au.
> 
> sooooo many thanks to Jarka (singledadniall on tumblr) and TC (multishippinfool). without them, this fic would have died on page four like all the others. and if it hadn't, it wouldn't be as great as it is now.

Niall’s phone went off as he was walking off set.

The crowd around him bustled, talking and laughing as they set up for the next scene, thankfully one Niall wasn’t in. His feet were beginning to hurt from all the walking to and from different places for filming. He glanced at his phone, saw the name of his manager and his scowling face in the picture Niall had set, and sighed. He really didn’t want to think about another big project his manager wanted him to do.

His manager was talking before Niall could even put the phone to his ear. “...just got the call from some charity, they’re trying to raise money for sick kids in third world countries,” he rattled on and Niall rubbed his forehead.

“Rich,” he grumbled, then spoke louder when Rich kept talking, “Rich, slow down mate, haven’t heard a word you said through all the noise here.” Rich stopped talking, huffing like it was Niall’s fault he talked too fast. Niall walked away from the crowd, hoping the low pain in his head didn’t turn into a headache. “What were you saying? From the beginning.”

Rich started over, voice slow as if he were talking to a child. “One Direction’s being called together for a reunion concert.” Niall decided to ignore his irritation with his manager. “If it goes well, there’s talk about doing a tour to drum up some extra funds.”

Niall scrubbed his face. “I can’t tour, you know that.” His manager made a frustrated sound.

“This isn’t about a tour that might not happen, Niall, it’s about the charity concert.” Niall rolled his eyes and sighed.

“When is it?”

“If everyone agrees, it’ll be on the fifth of next month.” Niall tried to think if he had anything scheduled. Before he could get past remembering that shooting for the film he was working on ended in two weeks, his manager said, “You’re free. I made sure it would be set on a day you’d be free.” He gave a small smile then. Rich was annoying at times, but he was a good manager.

“I don’t see why the other boys wouldn’t agree,” Niall said into the phone as he glanced back at the filming. The female lead was laughing obnoxiously, and Niall had to wonder if the joke was really that funny or she was just a really good actress. “Lou doesn’t have a game and Harry’s not on tour. Liam can take a day out of his schedule…”

“Zayn’s already agreed,” Rich said casually. Niall froze, foot mid-scuff against the floor. “So I’ll let them know you’ve agreed, yeah? Good, this would be really good publicity for that movie you’re doing. Who knows, maybe you’ll get some better offers…”

Niall tuned him out, and after a while Rich said he had to go and hung up. Dread curled up in Niall’s stomach and he made no effort to rid himself of it.

++

Niall hadn’t _meant_ to take a plus one to the rehearsal. He’d been hoping to get around it, but it hadn’t worked that way.

His four ex-bandmates were waiting for him outside the hall. Louis and Harry grinned as soon as they saw Niall and his plus one, and his plus one squealed in excitement and raced toward them.

He watched fondly, very determinedly not saying anything to anyone as he walked up.

Louis was kneeling, listening to the little girl as she told him animatedly about everything that had gone on since she’d seen him last. Her dark brown hair was pulled into a loose ponytail at the top of her head, baby curly q’s framing her forehead.

“You haven’t taken me to play,” she finished with a frown. Louis adopted a very serious looking frown.

“I know, love, I’ve just been busy,” he told her. “But I tell you what, I’m due for practice tonight. If your da says it’s alright I’ll bring you, what do you say?” Her face lit up and she turned to Niall expectantly, causing him to chuckle.

“How can I say no to the both of you?” he told her. She grinned, face lighting up with her wide smile and her dimples showing heavily. Niall grinned back at her as Louis stood, picking her up with him.

“Addy!” Liam exclaimed. “You’ve grown so big!” She smiled shyly at Liam, causing him to smile, his eyes crinkling at the ends like they always did when Addy was around. Liam was usually too busy to visit, but that hadn’t stopped the five year-old from developing a crush on him. It was painfully apparent to anyone in the same room as them.

Harry stepped closer. “Thought you weren’t gonna bring her?” he asked quietly.

“Her mum canceled,” he said simply. “Was gonna call a nanny, but she said she wasn’t feeling well. Didn’t want to just leave that for the nanny to deal with, did I?” Harry nodded in understanding.

“Who’s that?” Addy asked, pointing at Zayn. Zayn smiled slightly while Niall reprimanded her for her manners. “Sorry,” she mumbled.

“I’m Zayn,” he said. “I’m a friend of your da’s.”

“I’ve never seen you before,” Addy said. Niall could feel the heat rising up his neck. Zayn just smiled at Addy.

“I’ve been really busy making movies,” he said. “I haven’t had any time to stop by.”

“My da makes movies too!” she said. “Is that how you met him?” He shook his head.

“I met him a long, long time ago,” he said.

“When you were my age?” Addy asked. Niall saw someone poke his head out of the doorway and gesture for them to go inside.

“How old are you?” Zayn asked patiently as they started to make their way into the building.

“I’m five and three quarters,” Addy said matter-of-factly. “My birthday’s in January.”

“Yeah?” Zayn said, his eyebrows raising in mock surprise. “Mine is too!” She giggled, her hand covering her mouth. “We’ll have to celebrate the next one together, yeah?” She nodded, and Niall bit his lip, pinching Louis slightly. Louis grunted and fell back, glaring at Niall, who sent a pointed look toward Zayn, then Addy.

“Oh, let them,” Louis grumbled at them as Zayn stepped ahead to talk to Liam. “It’s not like she understands anyway.”

“Look how attached she is to you three,” Niall argued. “You know she’ll ask about him after this is over.”

“So tell her he’s busy,” Louis argued right back. Addy slipped out of his arms and darted toward Harry, who took her hands and started to sway with her as if he were dancing. Niall watched her, lip pulled between his teeth, and sighed.

“Her accent’s gotten thicker,” Liam said. “Did you take her back to Ireland?” Niall nodded.

“I’ve been filming there, for the most part,” Niall said. “And her mum’s there, didn’t see any reason to move her out.” Liam nodded. “But whatever job Rich’s got lined up after this is out here, so we’ve moved into the flat.”

“I’m going to go to school here in London!” she interrupted. “Da told me already!”

“You’re going to make lots of friends,” Harry told her. “Maybe even lots of boyfriends.” He wiggled his eyebrows at Niall, but Addy scrunched her nose.

“Gross,” she said. “Boys my age have cooties.” The boys erupted into laughter, and Niall grinned at her.

“I’ve taught you well,” he said, smiling fondly. She giggled at him and raced off, pulling Harry behind her.

They spent most of the time going over what songs they’d be singing and warming up. They only spent a few minutes on the actual stage, going through the choruses of the songs they’d picked out. Addy watched avidly from a chair in the audience, her gaze flicking between each of the boys in excitement and awe. When Liam gestured to her, she raced on stage and started dancing with him, causing everyone around to start to laugh.

Niall picked her up, smiling broadly, and the rehearsal ended. The event manager told them they’d pick up again the day after next, taking the time to go through each song, and they were shooed out of the building as everyone started to clean up.

“We’re going to Uncle Louis’ practice, right, Da?” Addy asked. Niall nodded and she smiled at him, scooting down to race to catch up with Louis and take his hand. He heard her asking Liam if he was joining them as Zayn stepped up to walk beside him.

“Hey, Nialler,” he said casually. Niall gave a small hello, his eyes on Addy as she bounced between Louis and Liam. “I never heard you had a baby girl.”

“I’ve wanted to keep her out of the spotlight,” Niall said calmly. He nodded toward the others and said, “They only know because they come to visit in Ireland, time to time.” The accusation settled between them, the only acknowledgement of Zayn’s absence that Niall planned to give.

“I’m sorry,” Zayn offered. “If I’d known…” He trailed off, his statement falling flat.

“Me and Addy get on just fine,” Niall said. “She sees Louis and Harry the most, they come to visit a lot.” Addy turned to check that Niall was behind her, sending him a dazzling grin before turning back to listen to whatever Louis was saying.

“She looks like you,” Zayn said. Niall nodded.

“Get that a lot,” he mumbled. “Luck of the Irish, eh?” He laughed at his own joke, and Zayn laughed with him. After a few seconds, Addy bounced back to them, but instead of going to Niall she went to Zayn.

“Do you want to come to Uncle Louis’ practice?” she asked, smile bright. “Uncle Louis said that everyone’s invited.”

“I’m sure Zayn’s got things to do -” Niall started, but Zayn cut him off.

“I’d love to come, Addy,” he said with a charming smile. She smiled widely at him and ran off to tell Louis, and Niall watched her, his lip pulled between his teeth. Zayn didn’t say anything else.

Harry climbed in with Niall, saying that he’d been dropped off and he’d come stay at Niall’s apartment afterward so they could catch up. Niall buckled Addy into her car seat before getting into the driver’s side, pulling out of the lot and following Louis toward the stadium where his practice was being held.

Addy asked Harry many questions in the time it took them to get there. She was interested in the people Harry met as a musician, and he told her all about Beyonce and Ed Sheeran as they drove. She was particularly interested in Ed, but when Harry told her Ed had a girlfriend, she gained a pout and stopped asking.

Niall chuckled softly as he pulled into the lot behind the stadium, Addy unbuckling herself as she prepared to get out. Harry went to greet Liam as he pulled in, and Zayn joined Louis as he started toward the stadium.

Once out of the car, Addy rushed toward Louis, who picked her up and placed her on his shoulders. She giggled, arms flying out to balance herself, and looked down at Zayn as he began to talk to her. Niall followed a little behind, watching sullenly.

“Da, look how big it is!” she yelled as they walked into the stadium. Louis handed her to Zayn as he jogged off to get ready for his practice, and Harry and Liam greeted some of the players on Louis’ team.

“Don’t get in the way of the team,” Niall told her as Zayn set her down and she ran off.

“She likes footie, then?” Zayn asked. Niall nodded.

“Loves it,” he said. “Her favorite player’s her uncle Louis, and her favorite team is her uncle Louis’ team.” He laughed. “Not that she knows the team name.” Zayn smiled, gaze turning toward Addy.

Niall studied him, lips pursing slightly. He’d aged, they all had, but he didn’t really look different. A few tattoos Niall hadn’t seen before spotted his left arm, and his hair was cut in Niall’s favorite style. Niall wondered idly if he’d gotten it done recently.

Louis waved at them as he came back to the field, dressed to play. He kneeled to tell Addy she’d have to wait to play til after the practice and laughed when she pouted, telling his coach, “How could you say no to that face?” when he yelled at him to get on the field. The coach rolled his eyes but smiled and gestured for Louis to get a move on, so Louis planted a raspberry kiss on Addy’s forehead and shooed her back in the other men’s direction before heading back to the field.

She giggled as she made her way back to Niall, smiling shyly and dodging out of the way when Liam reached for her. Niall smiled widely.

“Got a thing for Liam, huh?” Zayn said, a smile in his voice. “Just like her dad, that one.”

Niall started and looked at Zayn, whose eyes were firmly fixed on Addy. After a second, Niall turned back to her. “Addy’s got a lot of things from me,” he said as she made her way closer. “But definitely not my taste in men.” He swooped over to her and picked her up, throwing her over his shoulder. She laughed as he ran across the field, but he stopped after a while, feeling a slight twinge in his knee. He set her down next to the bench there on the field and sat, watching Louis’ team practice for a bit.

She patted his bad knee gently and wandered back to the boys. Niall watched her, mouth set in a thin line, as she walked over to Zayn and sat next to him on the faux grass, conversing with him quietly. He smiled at her and laughed a few times, and she smiled at him endearingly. Niall’s chest ached along with his knee.

“Don’t look so down, Nialler,” Louis said, patting his back. Niall jumped and looked up at him. He smiled playfully, but his next words were serious. “Maybe it’s a good thing that he’s back.”

Niall gave a noncommittal grunt as Louis took a swig from his water bottle and raced back onto the field. Liam joined Zayn and Addy’s conversation, giving her his whole attention and causing her to blush. Niall smiled fondly at the sight.

After a while, Louis’ practice ended, and he invited Addy onto the field. Some of the others on his team remained behind to join them in a mock-match, and Niall watched as they let Addy score multiple times with increasingly exaggerated misses. He laughed as the goalie flew the wrong way pretending to try to stop Addy’s kick, and it skipped past his feet and into the goal.

“Did you see, Da?” she yelled at him, giggling in glee when the team picked her up and toted her around as if she’d kicked the game winning goal. He laughed and nodded to her, watching her face light up.

“Got your eyes,” Zayn said, and Niall jumped.

“Fuck, mate, don’t startle me like that,” Niall told him, pressing a hand to his chest as Zayn sat next to him, ignoring Niall’s words.

“Your smile, too. Can’t imagine what her mother looks like, she’s got everything from you.” Niall glanced at Addy, his lip pulled between his teeth again, before he lifted his fingers to his mouth and started chewing on his nails absently.

“She’s got her face shape,” he said after a while. “And her thick hair.”

“Who was it?” Zayn asked nonchalantly. Niall didn’t look up, didn’t want to look up. He wanted to believe it was just an old friend asking to ask.

“A girl I met on the set of one of the movies I was working on,” he said. “She didn’t have a big role, but I thought she was pretty enough to deserve one.” He chuckled to himself. “Not a good actress, though. Couldn’t hide it when she found out she was pregnant.” He smiled, watching Addy as she traipsed across the field, Louis’ team doting on her.

“M’niece!” he heard Louis shout. “Prodigy, she is!”

After a while she trotted over to Niall and leaned against him. He offered her Louis’ water bottle, and she gulped half of it down before yawning.

“Time to head home, love,” he told her gently. She whined, but it was cut short by another yawn. Louis laughed as he walked up, ruffling her pony tail.

“Don’t worry, Addy, the team loves you. They’ll have you back any day, love.”

“Go say goodbye to Liam and tell Harry we’re leaving,” Niall told her gently. She walked over to where Liam and Harry were sitting, and the three men watched as she hugged Liam goodbye and Harry followed her back to Niall. Liam waved, saying he had to leave, and left the stadium. “Thanks, Lou,” Niall said, grinning, “you and the boys are great babysitters.”

Louis snorted and hugged Addy tight before letting her go. “I better hit the showers before I start to smell like this permanently. See you boys in two days.” He waved and headed back to the showers, and the three men and the little girl made their way outside.

Zayn started to say goodbye, but Addy rushed forward and hugged him tight around the middle, cutting him short. He smiled fondly and ruffled her hair. “You be good for your da, little duck.”

Addy giggled. “I’m not a duck, Zayn, I’m a little girl.” He smiled at her as she pulled away.

“You’re my little duck, eh? Just for you and me.” She smiled and nodded and waved as he walked toward his car. Harry and Niall watched him leave the lot.

Addy was asleep before Niall had even drove for five minutes. He checked on her periodically in the mirror as Harry rambled on. After a while, Harry paused.

“You okay, Nialler?” he asked, voice careful. Niall gave him a sidelong glance.

“Why wouldn’t I be?”

“It’s been awhile since we’ve all seen Zayn,” Harry said in his slow drawl. “Honestly, I’m surprised him and Louis got on so well. Expected there to be claws.” Niall laughed, making sure to keep his voice quiet. “It hit you bad, back then. I just wanted to make sure you’re okay.”

Niall smiled at Harry, though he didn’t really feel any emotion behind it. “I’m not the baby of the group anymore, Hazza. That’s her job.” He nodded over his shoulder at Addy, who snored a little in response. Harry smiled fondly.

“Yeah, and she’s done a good job of taking your place,” Harry joked. Niall turned onto his street, his apartment coming into view. “I’m just saying I worry about you,” Harry said gently as Niall parked. “Zayn might think you had a crush on Liam, but everyone else knew better.”

“Harry,” Niall said softly, a warning in his voice. Harry threw up his hands and climbed out, pulling Addy gently from her car seat to carry her upstairs. Niall led the way up, unlocking his door and taking Addy. “Make a cuppa? It’s in the same place as always.” Harry disappeared into the kitchen as Niall went to tuck Addy in.

She woke slightly when he laid her down and smiled up at him sleepily. “Da?” she mumbled, rubbing her eyes. “I really like your friend. He’s nice.”

Niall brushed the curly q’s from her forehead, smiling gently. “Yeah, he is,” he said softly. “Go to sleep, love, we’ll get you signed up for school tomorrow.”

“Can I join footie, like Uncle Louis?” she asked, eyes already closed.

“Of course you can.” He stayed with her a few more minutes, just in case she woke up again, then went to join Harry on the couch.

++

“Where’s Addy?”

Each of the four men asked him, and he gave them all the same answer.

“Her mum’s in town, helping her get her things for school,” Niall said. “She said she’d help out while I was doing this charity thing.”

“So she’s at your apartment?” Harry asked, eyebrows wiggling. “Maybe I should stop by again.” Niall laughed, shoving at him.

“That’s my baby’s mother you’re talking about, you arse,” he said, still laughing. He grabbed his water bottle and took a long swig. He glanced over at Liam to find him tucking his cell phone into his pocket, expression thoughtful. “How’s Sophia, Liam?”

“She’s alright,” he said softly. Niall’s eyebrows rose at his expression and he shrugged. “We’ve been talking about kids lately. Ever since she met Addy, she’s convinced she wants one.”

Zayn nudged him with an elbow. “You’d be a great dad,” he told him. The other three men agreed.

“Well, I suppose,” Liam said. “I just hadn’t really thought about it before. We’re still young, yeah?”

“Don’t ask me,” Niall mumbled. “I learned the hard way.” Liam laughed.

“You’re definitely dad material, Nialler,” he said, ruffling Niall’s hair. Niall bat his hand away. “Whatever, enough about me. Haven’t heard much about our resident bad boy, eh?” He grinned at Zayn, who rolled his eyes. “What have you been up to, Zayn?”

“Acting,” Zayn replied. As the others pestered him for more information, the phone in Niall’s pocket buzzed. He pulled it out, raised his eyebrow, and stepped away to answer it.

Rich was talking before Niall could hear him again. “...going to be called Madder, kind of an eerie looking plot if you ask me-”

“Rich,” Niall said with a sigh. “Learn to start talking after I’ve answered, mate.” He heard Rich sigh and he grinned.

“Answer faster,” Rich mumbled before he started over. “Finally got the information for that movie I’ve got lined up for you here in London. It’s with that director, the one you had when you met Addy’s mother.” Niall hummed in recognition. “She asked for you by name, said you owed her a favor.” Niall gave a snort of laughter and glanced over at the guys. Harry was giving him a curious look, but no one else was paying attention.

“It’s got a bit higher budget than you normally work for, but she said you owed her so I booked you for it,” Rich said.

“It’s fine,” Niall said. “Ailene’d kill me if I didn’t do it."

“Good, about time you did something more high end,” Rich sniffed. Niall rolled his eyes. “Anyway, it’s called Madder. Looks to be about a man who’s losing his marbles.”

“Am I losing my marbles?” Niall asked. He didn’t bother to point out that he meant his character, not himself.

“No, that’s someone else. No idea who it is yet, Megan’s keeping it under wraps. Suppose you’ll find out on set, yeah?” Niall hummed. “Anyway, you’re playing the part of the lover.” Niall made a short noise, but his manager was quick to say, “I mean, not explicitly. It’s implied, or something like that. What’s that thing people like to say? Subtext.” Niall rubbed his forehead. “You’re actually something like his therapist. He’s supposed to nearly strangle you to death.”

“Jesus,” Niall muttered. His manager laughed. “At this point, Megan’s going to owe me after it’s all done and said.”

“You’re getting a decent chunk of change for it,” Rich said. “I suppose it makes up for it a little.” Niall rubbed the bridge of his nose and Rich rolled on. “Anyway, filming starts just a week after your charity event.”

“Will there be a lot?” Niall asked.

“It’s spaced out,” Rich said. “A couple of hours every day for a few weeks. You’ll be in after you drop off Addy and out before she’s done with school.”

“Okay,” Niall said with a sigh. “I’ve got to get back to rehearsals, Rich, let me know if anything comes up.”

“I’ll keep my ears open,” Rich responded, hanging up. Niall tucked his phone away and returned to the other men.

“What was that about?” Louis demanded immediately.

“Just my manager calling to tell me about my next movie,” Niall responded, drinking from his water bottle again. “Gonna be some weird thriller, I think.”

“Didn’t peg you as the type, Nialler,” Liam said, his eyes crinkling with the weight of his smile. Niall shrugged.

“I owe the director a favor,” he said. “Sort of.” Raised eyebrows prompted him to keep talking. “I met Addy’s mother on the set of her movie,” he explained. “She likes to hold it over me. I let her, I don’t mind, not really. My life’d be a whole lot different without Addy in it.”

The door to the hall opened and Addy bounced in, followed by her mother. She glanced around and smiled shyly and Harry gasped. “That’s where she gets that from, then!"

Niall chuckled and picked up Addy as she ran to him. “Boys, this is Madeline.” He introduced her to each of the boys and she gave a small wave. “Didn’t expect you’d be done so soon,” he said, turning to Addy.

“I got hungry,” she said matter-of-factly. “And I wanted you to come with us.” Niall smiled gently.

“I’m rehearsing right now, princess. You’ll have to wait a little bit.”

“That’s okay,” she said cheerily, hopping down and leading her mother to what she claimed was the perfect spot to watch. Niall chuckled and turned to the boys.

“One last go, then?” he asked. They nodded and tore into their set again.

The charity concert was a week away and Niall was beginning to feel relieved. He’d missed the boys, missed being on stage with them, but he felt entirely too comfortable dancing and singing with them again. It was a life he’d decided not to go back to, especially after Addy was born.

After they finished rehearsing, Addy demanded that each of them join her and her parents for dinner. Harry bowed out, saying that he had plans, and Liam apologized, saying he had to meet his wife. Louis beamed at her and told her he’d gladly join her, and Zayn told her that just the mention of food had his stomach growling like a monster. She’d giggled, clearly pleased despite two out of four saying no, and led the way out of the hall.

Her mother followed directly behind her, and Niall after them, his hand hovering behind Madeline’s back. The other men said they’d follow in their cars and Niall nodded at them, getting Addy into the car.

“They seem nice,” Madeline said as he got into the driver’s seat. He nodded absently. “Addy’s quite taken with Zayn.”

Niall’s lips pursed. “I wish she weren’t,” he said quietly as he pulled out of the lot. “Not like he has a clean track record for sticking around.”

“That was fifteen years ago,” Madeline told him quietly. “People change.” Niall looked away, lips pursed.

“Yeah well,” he mumbled, careful to keep his voice low, “he could’ve been less a twat about leaving, couldn’t he?” Madeline rubbed his arm soothingly as he drove to an old favorite of his, not far from his apartment.

Zayn stepped over as Louis pulled into the lot, smiling. “Still your favorite, huh, Niall?”

He smiled slightly, getting Addy from the car as Madeline stepped around. “They’ve still got the best food in London,” he said, leading Addy inside.

“When do you go back to Ireland?” he heard Louis ask Madeline as he found them a table away from the windows. Addy was absorbed into her conversation with Zayn, telling him all about the school she would be going to in just a few days time. Zayn listened avidly, supplying her with tales of his first year at school.

Their table never fell quiet. Niall had to remind Addy a few times not to talk with food in her mouth (“But look, Uncle Louis is doing it!”), and across the table Louis was definitely flirting with Madeline. Niall rolled his eyes and listened as Addy questioned Zayn for the entirety of their meal.

“Do you work on movies with my Da?” Addy asked.

“No,” Zayn said, putting his fork down. “I work on bigger movies.” Her eyes lit up as he talked about some of the movies he’d been in, and Niall pushed the remaining food on his plate around, thumb finding its way to his mouth.

“I think you should work with my Da,” Addy said after a while. Zayn smiled softly, glancing up at Niall, who didn’t meet his gaze. “Everyone would want to see it.”

“Why’s that, little duck?” Zayn asked.

“Because you guys look nice together,” Addy said with her childish honesty. “My Da looks really happy when you’re there.” Niall felt his face heating up, and Zayn laughed.

“You sure it’s not because Louis and the others are there?” he asked, smiling. Addy shook her head.

“I’ve seen my da with them,” she said matter-of-factly. “They don’t make Da smile like you do.”

“Addy, princess, finish your food,” Niall said loudly. She pouted at him and returned to her chicken fingers. He looked across the table to see Louis giving him a sympathetic look.

“Da!” Addy shouted, causing him to jump and turn to her quickly, expecting a mess. There was none, and she was grinning at him. “Zayn said we could go to the movie he’s working on, can we, can we please?” she begged.

Niall fought the urge to bite his fingernails. “I dunno, princess,” he said, looking up at Zayn. “Those places are usually really busy-”

“It’s fine,” Zayn said. “We’re wrapping up filming now, so it’s not as busy as it normally is.”

“I’ve been to your sets loads of times!” Addy complained. “Please Da, please can we go?” Niall looked at Madeline, who shrugged at him, effectively giving him all the power over the decision. He glanced back down at Addy, who was now giving him her best puppy dog expression.

The little bugger had been around Liam too long.

He sighed and sat back. “Okay, Addy,” he said gently, “if Zayn says we can go, we can go.” She smiled widely and turned back to Zayn, bouncing in her excitement. Niall scrubbed a hand over his face and tilted his head back.

++

Madeline yawned and stretched, standing next to Niall, who was holding a dozing Addy.

“Was it really necessary for me to come?” she mumbled from behind her hand.

“Yes,” Niall mumbled. “I needed the support.” Madeline snorted and rubbed her arms to warm up.

“Did we really have to be here this early?” she said. “Addy’s not even awake.”

“She’ll wake up soon,” Niall mumbled. “Zayn said they needed a five year old and he asked if I wouldn’t mind letting Addy do it.”

“You didn’t even ask me,” Madeline grumbled. Niall gave her a look and she shrugged. “I wouldn’t have said no, but that’s not the point.”

“You’re technically not even supposed to be in London,” Niall said. “I think you’ll be okay if I let Addy do a thing in a movie.” She shrugged and Niall caught sight of Zayn, who beckoned them over. He made his way toward where Zayn was standing, makeup plastered over his face. “Painted whore,” he said with a smirk. Zayn smacked his arm and smiled at Madeline, who smiled back shyly.

“Thanks for saying yeah, mate,” Zayn said. “We would’ve had to stop production to find another kid.” Niall shrugged.

“Addy would’ve cried for ages if I didn’t let her,” he said. Zayn smiled and rubbed her back, and she opened one groggy eye to stare at him like he’d done the most heinous act on earth.

“Hey, little duck,” Zayn said, smiling softly. “Good morning.”

“‘S too early,” she mumbled, hiding her face in Niall’s neck.

“C’mon, Addy,” Niall said gently. “You’ll have to wake up earlier than this to go to school.”

“Don’t wanna go to school,” Addy mumbled into his neck, causing him to laugh.

“Tell you what,” Zayn said, still rubbing her back, “if you wake up and help me now, I’ll introduce you to Captain America.” She perked, eyes scrunching as she studied him. “He’s a good friend of mine, he’d love to meet you.”

Niall tried to hide his smile. After a few seconds Addy shifted and Niall set her down so she could follow Zayn back onto the set. Madeline laughed softly.

“Suppose that’s the good thing about being a big time actor, yeah?” she asked. “Get to call in favors to help with grumpy kids.”

“Cap’s her favorite,” Niall said. “Because he’s Irish.” Addy must have told Zayn.

He felt a pang in his chest. It felt like ages ago that he’d told Zayn Captain America was one of his favorites, simply because he was Irish.

He glanced at Madeline, who was studying him quietly. “Oh, Nialler,” she said, ruffling his hair. “What are you gonna do when I’m gone, huh?”

“Suffer a slow, agonizing death,” he told her dryly, fixing his hair. She laughed.

“Maybe trying making up?” she suggested. “For Addy’s sake.” Niall glanced at Addy, where she was standing next to Zayn as he explained what they were going to do. She was listening intently, nodding every few seconds, fingernails worked up into her mouth. “And stop chewing on your fingers,” Madeline scolded. “She’s picking up the habit.”

“What’s a five year old got to be anxious about,” he muttered under his breath, turning to go get some coffee.

When the scene they needed Addy for was done filming, the director gave Addy special permission to explore the set, so long as her mother was there at all times and she didn’t touch anything without permission. Off she went, ogling at everything and demanding to know the labels of every single piece of equipment.

Niall stayed by the lunch table to wait. He knew the ins and outs of stages and sets and didn’t need a tour, and he’d really only come because Addy had asked him to and Madeline wouldn’t have gone if he hadn’t made her.

“Addy’s a smart girl,” Zayn said quietly. Niall started and turned a dark glare on him.

“Gonna get a broken nose for doing that, one of these days,” he muttered. Zayn just smiled, eyes crinkling slightly. “And yeah, she is. Always has been.” His hands twitched, but he had to remember not to chew on his nails anymore, because he didn’t want Addy to make a habit of doing it too.

“I’m on break for a bit,” Zayn said. “But the fashion designer is talking with Addy and her mum. You wanna go grab a better lunch and bring some back for them?”

Niall glanced at the food table, his stomach growling. There were a few donuts and finger sandwiches, but nothing good for a child to eat. Niall glanced over to where Madeline and Addy were talking to who he guessed was the designer and nodded.

Zayn led the way outside and gestured down the street. “There’s a good spot not too far,” he said. “We’ll grab something and be back in ten minutes.” Niall felt like that was a bit of an underestimate, but he followed Zayn down the street, rubbing his face.

“Ever start to feel irrelevant?” Niall asked after a minute of walking. Zayn glanced back at him. “I dunno, when we were younger a fan or two would come up to us and ask us for pictures or an autograph or whatever. Doesn’t really happen anymore."

Zayn hummed thoughtfully. “Guess we haven’t been in the spotlight enough to keep the fans’ interest.” He shrugged. “Although I think soon they’ll be on my tail again.”

“Yeah?” Niall asked as Zayn stopped in front of a small, hole-in-the-wall restaurant.

“Yeah,” Zayn said. “My next movie’s gonna be pretty big, I think. Got an all star cast in it, or something.”

“Sounds like the life,” Niall said as he stepped into line. Zayn shrugged, hands moving into his pockets.

“Sometimes I miss the lads, miss you.” Niall swallowed and turned toward the menu as Zayn stepped up to order. Niall tried to keep his gaze on the menu, but it kept drifting to Zayn, and the way his shirt still stretched against his shoulders, and the fact that that there was a bar code poking out over the collar of Zayn’s shirt.

Zayn turned to step out of the way and the tattoo was exposed. Under the barcode, Niall could make out six numbers in order - 232677.

_Fuck me,_ he thought absently, going blank. He could feel the heat rising in his face as he rushed to order, ordering a kids’ meal for Addy and getting something for Madeline as well. Zayn was getting drinks as he finished.

“Still like raspberry tea, Nialler?” he called, already going for the tea. Niall mumbled an affirmative and got Madeline’s drink. Addy’s childs cup was already full. They stepped aside to wait and Zayn looked at Niall and did a double-take. Niall’s fingers were in his mouth again.

They were heading out of the shop again five minutes later, bags and drinks in hand. Niall glanced at Zayn to find him frowning slightly, eyes squinted against the sun. “What’s wrong?” Zayn asked. Niall’s eyebrows raised and he glanced at Zayn, surprised. “You seem bothered.”

Niall looked down at his feet, glad his hands were full. His nails were going to stop growing, at this rate. Zayn bumped his hip against Niall’s, trying to get his attention, and Niall finally looked up at him. “Sometimes you surprise me, is all,” he said finally. Zayn blinked and remained silent, turning his gaze away. Niall stared straight ahead.

Zayn led the way back onto the set, saying nothing else, and Niall went to find Addy and her mother to give them their food. Madeline thanked him and Addy sat down to eat.

Addy ran out of her drink faster than everyone else, so Niall stood to go and get her some water. Zayn was already standing there, drinking from his own cup, and he smiled at Niall as he approached.

“Hey, Niall?” Niall glanced at Zayn, who wasn’t looking at him. “What’s the deal, with you and Madeline?”

“Asking for Louis, yeah?” Niall joked, causing Zayn to snicker. His nose scrunched up and Niall suddenly felt too hot around his neck. “Never meant for it to be anything serious,” Niall said with a shrug. “When we found out she was pregnant we tried to make a thing out of it, y’know, for the baby’s sake, but we’re not compatible like that.” He had to remember not to chew on his nails again. “Madeline’s a good friend. She listens when I talk and she understands me pretty well. Suppose she should, Addy’s just a little miniature version of me.”

They didn’t say much else as Niall filled up the cup. He was pulling away when someone bumped into Zayn and he flew right into Niall. Water got everywhere, and Niall could feel Zayn’s breath on his neck. There was silence for a few seconds, and then Zayn pulled away, smiling sheepishly.

“Sorry Nialler,” he said. Niall smiled back weakly and looked down at his shirt. “I have one, that I came in, you can borrow it-” Niall shook his head, chest aching at the suggestion.

“Might as well go,” he said with a smile, “We’ve been here long enough, yeah?”

Zayn bit his lip. “Are you sure?” Niall nodded quickly.

“Positive. See you for final rehearsal tomorrow.” Zayn nodded and Niall went back to Addy and Madeline quickly. Madeline raised her eyebrows as Niall picked up Addy, but he didn’t say anything, just jerked his head toward the exit and led the way there.

Addy complained most of the way home and fell asleep five minutes away. Niall rubbed the bridge of his nose and sighed, and Madeline rubbed his arm. “What happened?"

Niall glanced at Addy’s sleeping form and then at Madeline, who understood. When they got to Niall’s flat, Niall tucked Addy into her bed and closed the door to her room before leaning against it, cupping his mouth and letting out a short, muffled yell.

“I hate him,” he said with as much loathing as he could muster. Madeline was sitting at the breakfast bar, leaning against the counter with her arms crossed, watching Niall as he started pacing. “He got a fucking -” he covered his mouth again to yell out his frustration and stepped into the kitchen, ready to angry bake like he used to do in Mullingar before the X-factor. He was careful not to bang or slam anything though, because he didn’t want Addy to wake up to find him yelling about her new favorite person.

“Use your words, Niall,” Madeline said in a gentle tease. Niall took a deep breath, setting the ingredients on the counter as he went.

“He got a damn barcode tattoo,” he said, glaring at the ingredients as he started to mix them together like everything was their fault. “That _fucking_ asshole… got a _fucking_ tattoo… with _my_ X-factor number on it!” He cracked the egg too forcefully, and it broke over the counter, causing him to cover his mouth to curse loudly against his hand. Madeline was cleaning it up before he could register getting a cloth.

Niall rinsed off his hand as she cleaned up and got a new egg to crack. When she sat down again, he continued his angry baking. “Are you sure, Niall?” she asked gently.

“Positive,” he seethed. “Saw it clear as day, all six numbers in order.” He started working the ingredients together, pouring all his frustration into it. After a second, he paused and braced his arms on the counter, nostrils flaring. “The prick has the nerve to get a tattoo dedicated to me, but can’t even call me on the fucking phone?” He grabbed the empty egg carton and threw it across the kitchen. Madeline just watched, hands cupped over her mouth. He caught her eyes and turned back to his angry baking.

After a few moments of Niall working in silence, Madeline said, “So what are you really angry at, Niall?” His hands stopped and he looked up at her. “I mean, yeah, I get it, it’s really shitty of him to get a part of you immortalized forever on his body but never talk to you, but that’s something you could tell him yourself instead of coming home to angry bake and angry clean after.”  He turned back to his baking. “Honestly Niall, you usually save the angry tasks for after you’ve already hashed out the issue with someone. So what’s preventing you now?”

Niall gave a defeated sigh. “It’s almost over,” he said as he began to coat the baking pan with cooking spray. “And then he’s just gonna leave and I won’t have to worry anymore.”

Madeline shook her head. “Do you think Addy’s going to accept that?” she asked as Niall began to pour the batter into the pan. “She’s head over heels for him. Like father, like daughter, really.” Niall gave her a sharp look and she shrugged, splaying her hands palm-up on the counter. “Addy’s not the only one who notices the way you light up when you’re around him.”

“I don’t light up when I’m around him,” Niall mumbled as he put the mix into the oven. Madeline snorted. “Whatever,” he said. “The concert’s in two days, and Zayn will be off filming whatever hotshot movie he’s starring in next, and he’ll be out of my damn hair. She’s got better uncles who stick around and pay attention to us.”

After a few seconds of Niall staring at the oven, light on to give him view of the baking mix, Madeline said, “Eventually you’re going to have to talk to him, Niall.” He gave her a sidelong glance. “Not just for Addy but for you. All this anger’s not good for you, especially aimed at someone you were so close to.” She stood then. “And especially not aimed at yourself.” He blinked and watched as she walked into Addy’s room before he turned to the kitchen. It was carelessly dirty, and just looking at it made his fingers itch.

He began to clean up his mess, thoughts all over the place but always coming back to Zayn. His fingers drummed against the counter even as he cleaned it, thinking about all the things he wanted to say to Zayn. He grumbled to himself and started washing the dishes he’d used, scrubbing harder than he needed to. Madeline’s words came back to him, and he thought about what they meant as his cleaning moved toward the rest of the flat.

++

The charity concert went on without any problems.

Each of the boys smiled and danced and Niall remained hypersensitive to Zayn’s presence. Madeline sat with Addy and Sophia behind the stage, enjoying the night before her flight home in the morning. When the concert ended, the boys began to mingle, and Addy remained at Niall’s side until she began to grow sleepy. Niall told Madeline to take her home; he could ride with one of the boys.

Liam and Sophia grew cozier as the night drew toward a close, so he decided it was best not to ask them. As he went searching for Louis or Harry, Zayn popped up next to him, startling him again. He heaved a dramatic sigh, glaring at Zayn, who only smiled sheepishly.

“Need a ride, Nialler?” He bit his lip and glanced around, but Louis and Harry were nowhere in sight. His phone buzzed in his pocket and he looked at it to find a text from Madeline asking him to pick up some cold medicine for Addy. He rubbed his face and looked up at Zayn, who was waiting patiently.

“Mind stopping by the store on the way?” he asked. “Addy needs medicine.” Zayn smiled and said it was no problem and Niall was already beginning to regret it as he followed him toward his car.

The ride to the store was quiet, and Niall was beginning to feel awkward. He took the reprieve from Zayn’s presence in stride as he walked into the store, finding the child’s cold medicine and paying for it slowly, taking his time. He didn’t want to go out there, didn’t want to do what he knew he needed to do.

Eventually he began to feel bad for stalling, so he made his way back to Zayn’s car and climbed in. As Zayn began to drive, he said, “Spit it out, Nialler.” Niall blinked, thumbing the small cardboard box in his hand, and sighed.

“I’ve been so angry at you for everything,” he said finally. Zayn gave him a surprised look. “I’ve been upset that you left and upset that you sided against Louis and upset that we all pretended it was fine but you never said a word to us unless it was necessary.” Zayn’s knuckles had turned white against the steering wheel, but he waited for Niall to finish. “I’ve been so upset with you, but I’ve been upset with myself too.”

Zayn made a strangled sound, but Niall kept talking. “I’ve been upset with myself because I didn’t try harder to make you feel better,” Niall said. “I didn’t try harder to make sure you were alright or that you were getting what you needed and that they weren’t taking advantage of you.” His thumbnail had worked its way in between his teeth, and he pulled it away to say, “You were a right fucking prick, but I hated that I didn’t change anything.”

Zayn had pulled up in front of Niall’s flat already, and was staring at Niall in shock and disbelief. “Niall, there wasn’t anything you could’ve done.” He placed his hand on Niall’s shoulder, but Niall shrugged it off.

“You’re right,” he told Zayn, “I couldn’t have done anything to change anything, but I should have tried.” After a second, he turned a piercing gaze on Zayn. “But there was quite a load of things you could’ve done, and you didn’t, so don’t think I’m not still angry at you just because I’ve got the why off my chest.”

Zayn looked down. “I know,” he said softly. “I’m sorry.”

“I can’t trust you,” Niall said. “I can’t trust that you’ll stick around, and I don’t want Addy in that environment. I don’t want to be afraid that she’ll get her heart broken just like I did.” Zayn’s eyes closed, and he turned his body back to face the steering wheel.

After a few seconds, he looked at Niall again. “I won’t leave,” he said. Niall swallowed. “I made that mistake already and I missed you every damn step of the way.” It was Niall’s turn to look away. “I’ll show you, Nialler, you can trust me.”

Niall wasn’t sure if Zayn was promising for him or for Addy, but he got another text from Madeline telling him to hurry up. He looked up at Zayn, who was studying him intently. Niall’s fingers ghosted against Zayn’s arm briefly before he stepped out of the car and made his way into the flat without looking back.

He handed Madeline the medicine and glanced out of the window to see Zayn’s car stalling outside his flat. He swallowed and took Addy’s dirty sheets to the wash.

++

Niall rubbed his eyes sleepily as he pulled up to the location of the set for his new movie. Addy had finally begun to feel better, and had just arrived to her first day of school, but her cold had been bad and she hadn’t got much sleep, which resulted in him not getting much sleep. Madeline had left a week later than intended, but once Addy’s symptoms started letting up she had to go home.

He walked onto the set and was immediately greeted by Ailene, the director. She smiled and then frowned at him. “You look awful,” she said, tone disapproving.

“Sorry, Ai,” he mumbled, rubbing at his face. “Haven’t been getting much sleep lately since Addy’s been sick.”

“Oh, that poor girl,” Ailene said, pulling a face. “What did you do to my little darling?” Niall rolled his eyes. “Whatever, you’re here now. Get to make-up.” He nodded, starting toward where she was pointing, but grabbed her arm tightly when his eyes fell on a familiar face.

“You didn’t,” he mumbled to her. She followed his gaze and smiled.

“I needed people who had chemistry, Niall,” she told him. He turned a dark glare on her and she gave him her best glare back. “You said you’d do this for me, and you can’t back out now."

He wanted to throw something. He wanted to break something. He gave her another glare and mumbled, “You’re gonna owe me for this one, Ailene,” before turning and heading for make-up.

Zayn met him there.

“You knew I’d be in this,” Niall told him with a glare. Zayn shrugged, looking down at his own feet. Niall huffed at Zayn’s sudden bashfulness and plopped into the chair as the make-up artist started to fuss over him.

“I didn’t want to ruin the surprise,” Zayn said. “After all, you’re the star.” Niall’s eyebrows scrunched together.

“It’s about the guy who goes crazy and starts killing people,” he said. Zayn shrugged.

“I mean yeah,” he said, pursing his lips. Most of his tattoos had been covered up by the artists already. As Niall was attended to, another artist pulled Zayn into the chair next to him and started covering more tattoos. “But you’re the hero, aren’t you?” Niall shrugged slightly. “You do end up stopping me, after all,” Zayn said.

Niall closed his eyes. He really didn’t want to do this movie anymore.

He felt Zayn’s hand ghost against his arm, and he looked up at him again. Zayn was smiling comfortingly. “It’s okay, Nialler,” he said. “Trust me, okay?”

Trust him.

The words made Niall feel warm, made him look away. It was hard to think that he could ever not trust Zayn. He nodded, and Zayn’s hand fell away. The silence felt comfortable.

They were shooed into wardrobe as Ailene came to talk to them about their characters. She stressed to Zayn that the movie would start with his character seeming normal, and do a complete one-eighty very abruptly. Niall asked about the choking scene that Rich had brought up to him the other day, and she simply smiled and said that’d come a little later in the film and they’d be filming that scene toward the end of the production.

She told them that they could create entire worlds for their characters, if they wanted. Any special things they wanted to add to their characters they could, within reason. As they started toward the set, she begged them to discuss the relationship their characters were supposed to develop through the movie.

Filming started quickly. A five minute scene between Niall and Zayn turned into a five hour shoot. Niall wanted to be productive, but he kept tensing up every time Zayn got too close or the atmosphere of the scene shifted. After a while Ailene called cut and pulled him aside, an exasperated look on her face.

“What the hell is going on with you, Horan?” she demanded. He started chewing onhis fingernail. “I wanted you guys because you have chemistry, but every time his shadow moves toward you you flinch and lean away.”

Niall rubbed his face. “I’m sorry,” he mumbled. “I’m just not used to being around Zayn like this.”

She made a frustrated noise. “Whatever’s going on between you guys, fix it. Fast.” Her annoyed look dropped into a pleading one. “Please, this is my golden opportunity.”

Niall nodded, then glanced at his watch and started to panic. “I’ve got to go,” he said quickly, moving back to wardrobe to take off the clothing they’d given him for the wardrobe. Make-up was at his side with a cloth to clean off some of the make-up on his face.

“Hey,” Zayn said, catching his arm as he was starting toward the door. Niall glanced up at him. “Can I come over later?”

Niall bit his lip and nodded. “Sure.” Zayn smiled slightly and let him go, saying he’d see him later and moving back toward the set. Niall watched him before leaving quickly.

Addy was looking lively when he picked her up. She climbed into her car seat and told him all about her teacher and how she was going to make him something special for Christmas. He just smiled at her and drove her home.

He ruffled through her backpack as he cooked her dinner, glancing over the papers her teacher had sent her home with. A summary of the coursework, a greeting letter, and a list of supplies needed for each student were tossed in with Addy’s ‘homework,’ a few sheets of paper teaching her how to write her name and her numbers on them. He set it on the table and called her to do her homework for that day while she waited for dinner.

“Smells good, Da,” she said. “Whatcha cooking?”

Niall glanced over his shoulder at the mac n’ cheese baking in the oven, then looked at her and smiled. “It’s your favorite.” Her face lit up and she turned back to her homework.

The doorbell rang as he was sprinkling extra cheese on top of the finished dish. He set the cheese aside, pointed at Addy to sit back down and finish her homework, and went to get the door. Zayn was standing there holding a bottle of wine and some soda.

Niall raised his eyebrow at him, and Zayn smiled sheepishly. “I’ve been needing some wine,” he said as Niall let him inside. “Brought some grape soda so Addy could feel included.”

Niall chuckled softly, knowing that Addy would like that. He took the drinks to the fridge as Zayn walked into the kitchen and Addy threw herself against him.

“I didn’t know you were coming over!” she said gleefully.

“I wanted to surprise you, little duck,” he told her. She giggled.

“Da’s making my favorite.”

Niall finished sprinkling the last of the cheese on top of the baked dish and glanced at Addy sternly. “Did you finish your homework?” She nodded dutifully and held it up for him to check. “Good. Put it away and go wash your hands.”

She nodded and dashed out of the kitchen as Zayn started getting plates from the cupboard.

“Same place as always, huh, Nialler?” he asked as he began to set the table. Niall smiled, setting the macaroni in the middle of the table and sitting down to eat. Addy rushed back to the table, shaking the last of the water from her hands, and sat between Niall and Zayn, grinning.

“Da,” she said, before sticking her finger in her mouth to wiggle one of her front teeth. “My tooth is loose!”

“The tooth fairy’s gonna be so happy when that thing pops out,” he told her matter-of-factly. She giggled and turned to Zayn.

“The last time I lost a tooth, the tooth fairy gave me one whole dollar.”

“A dollar?” Zayn gasped dramatically. Addy giggled. “She only gave me a quarter for each of mine.”

“Those were hard times,” Niall said with a smile and a wink at Addy, who giggled again and watched as Niall plated her food. He gestured for Zayn’s plate and filled it up, before giving himself the same helping.

Zayn and Niall talked more about their characters after they finished eating, and Addy wandered into the living room. When Niall glanced at the clock again, it was eight o’ clock. He stood, ready to tell Addy it was time for bed, but she was asleep on the couch.

He smiled slightly and carried her to bed, and she didn’t wake up. He took off her shoes and tucked the covers around her and closed the door on his way out, picking up her glass of grape soda on the way back to the kitchen. Zayn was pouring them more wine.

“Been awhile since I drank anything last,” Niall said, taking the glass. “It’s nice and fruity, but far too light.” Zayn chuckled.

“I thought it’d be more appropriate than stronger alcohol,” he said. “You do have a five year old, Niall.” Niall nodded and tipped his glass back.

“To fatherhood.”

“To fatherhood,” Zayn said with a laugh. They sat again, and Zayn seemed to be rolling something on his tongue.

“Spit it out, Zayn,” Niall told him. Zayn glanced up, smiled, and looked down at his glass.

“You were right,” he said. “I was a right prick for leaving and cutting off things with you and the guys.” His fingers tapped at the table, and Niall watched them, hands hooked together in his lap. “I was… convinced that it would make everything easier.” Niall watched him quietly. “With all the things with Perrie, and then Shahid, and all that shit that went down with Louis, I just thought, what’s the point? I’m upsetting them. There’s no need to make it worse.”

He swirled his wine in his glass, jaw working. “I didn’t want what was going on with Louis to work its way to you guys,” he said. “Especially not to you, Niall.” Niall stared down at his hands. “After a while, it didn’t seem fair to try and change it. I’d given you mates so long without me, going back felt like forcing you to forgive me.”

“It wouldn’t have been,” Niall said softly. Zayn didn’t respond. Neither of them looked up, and the silence that fell was tense.

After a while, Zayn said, “So it seems we both have things we regret about the past.” Niall couldn’t help the short laugh he gave then, looking up to find Zayn giving him a small, fond smile.

“So it seems,” he agreed. He rested his hand on the table, palm up. “Forward then?” Zayn nodded.

“Forward.”

The night crawled on, and eventually Zayn said he had to leave. Niall walked him to the door and Zayn stepped onto the landing outside his flat, turning to look Niall in the eye.

“See you on set, then,” he said. Niall nodded.

“Thanks for the wine,” he said with a smile. “Seems I’ve turned into a middle aged mum.” Zayn chuckled.

“Think parenthood suits you,” he said. Niall pretended not to notice the way Zayn’s eyes darted toward his lips or the way he licked his own and shrugged.

“Addy means everything to me.”

It was quick and awkward. Niall turned his head away and down, and felt Zayn whisper, “Fuck,” against his cheek before he was wheeling away and heading down the hall before Niall could say anything. Niall just watched him, thumbnail between his teeth.

“Da?” he heard Addy call from behind him. He turned quickly and looked down at her as she rubbed her eye. “What was Zayn doing?”

“Saying goodnight,” he said gently, closing the door to the hallway and leading her back down the hall. “What’s wrong, princess?”

“I had a nightmare,” she said with a pout. Niall picked her up. “Can I sleep with you tonight?”

“Okay, love,” he said gently, carrying her to his room. “I’m just gonna shower and then I’ll come back okay?” She nodded and curled up under his covers and he took his pajamas to the bathroom and showered, thoughts on the fact that Zayn had definitely tried to kiss him, and he hadn’t let him.

Niall took a deep breath as he washed his hair out, closing his eyes. Fucked. Everything was fucked. He showered quickly, pulled on his clothes and went to bed, where Addy waited, still awake. She curled up against him as soon as he got into the bed, and he turned the television on to a cartoon show and set the volume low.

“Wanna talk about it, Addy?” he asked her gently.

“There was dead people,” she said after a few heartbeats of silence. “And I saw you and Ma and Uncle Louis and Uncle Harry and Liam and Zayn.” Niall’s breath caught in his throat, and he wrapped a gentle arm around her. “I kept trying to talk to you and you wouldn’t answer.”

“It’s okay, love,” Niall said softly, pressing a kiss to her forehead. “It was just a dream.” Addy sighed softly, and after a few seconds she asked him to sing to her. He complied, singing to her long after she had fallen asleep.

He kept the tv on, knowing she would need the comfort in case she woke up again. After an hour of staring at the television, he fell asleep.

++

Niall had every intention of saying something when he finally saw Zayn the next day.

Except, apparently, they weren’t shooting any scenes with Zayn that morning.

Niall was dismissed an hour before he was meant to pick up Addy, and he got a call from Louis as he was walking toward his car.

“The team keeps asking about Addy,” he said. “You should bring her to practice tonight.”

“After she’s done her homework,” Niall said. “And I still have to sign her up for her own footie team.” Louis laughed.

“That can wait til tomorrow, can’t it?” Niall shrugged his shoulders slightly and rubbed his eyes. “Harry’s gonna be there.”

Niall paused, and his head tilted back against the headrest of the driver’s seat. “He told you what happened, didn’t he?”

“Yeah,” Louis said simply. “Practice starts at six, see you then!” And he hung up.

Niall gave a heavy sigh and drove to Addy’s school to wait for her to get out. She was excited when Niall told her Louis had invited her to his practice, but grew deflated when he told her she had to eat all her food and do all her homework first.

“But Da, what if I’m not hungry?” she whined.

“All of it,” he told her simply, driving home. She pouted at him and he chuckled, shooing her inside and taking her backpack to look at the notices the teacher had sent home. “Picture day is soon,” he told her, glancing through the paper, “Gram’s gonna love that one, right?”

“Right,” she said with a nod, sitting at the table. He set her homework down in front of her and started dinner, looking through the rest of the papers.

“Parent teacher conference,” he mumbled, looking through them, “Don’t be late to pick up your kids…” Briefly, he considered enrolling Addy in the after school program, but he didn’t think it was necessary.

After looking through everything, he set it aside and turned his full attention to making dinner. He got several texts from Harry, a text from Liam saying Sophia was pregnant, and one from Louis asking if he was bringing Addy or not.

Niall did a double take and was dialing Liam’s number while Addy asked what he’d made that weird sound for. He hushed her gently and pointed to her homework as Liam picked up and shouted his name. Niall could practically hear the smile on his face.

“You’re going to be a dad!” he yelled back. Addy gave him an inquisitive look and he pointed at her homework again before turning to the food and lowering his voice. “It’s for sure? She’s been to the doctor?”

“Yeah, yeah,” Liam said quickly. “We went quick as we could, oh man, Niall, this is amazing!”

“I’m happy for you!” he said. He glanced over his shoulder at Addy. “Addy will be super excited to have a cousin.” She looked up, eyes bright. “Besides Theo, I mean, but Theo’s too old for her to really hang out with anyway.” He motioned toward her homework again and she glared at him and turned to it.

“When do you find out what it’ll be?” Liam asked quickly. Niall hummed.

“Usually about three, four months,” he told him. The other groaned.

“That’s so far from now,” he mumbled.

“What do you want it to be?” Liam was silent for a few moments.

“It won’t really matter,” he said finally. “I’d be pretty happy if it were either.” Niall smiled softly, imagining Liam with a little boy who looked nearly exactly like him. “Fuck, were you this happy when you found out Mads was pregnant?”

“Yeah,” he said softly, looking over at Addy fondly. She was coloring in the picture of a cow with a pink crayon. “Only time I was happier was when I got to hold Addy for the first time.” He heard muffled talking on the other side of the phone.

“I’ve got to go, Ni,” Liam said. “But we’re gonna have a party to celebrate. Everyone’s invited, yeah? It’ll be kid friendly.”

“Addy would love to see you,” he said. “Let me know when.”

“Sure thing,” and Liam hung up.

Niall set his phone aside and Addy asked, “Was that Liam?”

“Yeah,” he told her. “His wife is gonna have a baby.” She stared at him, confused, and Niall wondered how to broach the subject of women having children.

She lost interest as he floundered, and he turned back to the food, breathing a sigh of relief.

After he fed her and she finished her homework he ushered her back in the car to drive her to the stadium. Harry greeted him once there.

“It’s already started,” Harry said as they walked inside the stadium. Addy raced ahead, looked around, and squealed, racing around the corner. Niall’s eyebrows raised and he glanced at Harry, who shrugged, and they walked around the corner. Niall’s eyes searched for Addy immediately, and he saw her standing in front of Zayn, giggling at something he said.

Niall’s hand went to Harry’s arm, pinching hard. Harry muttered a curse and pushed at Niall, saying, “I didn’t know he was going to be here.” Niall gave him a look that said he didn’t believe it and Harry caved, mumbling, “Louis told me to talk to you guys.”

Niall glared at Harry, who shrugged. “How else was I gonna get the both of you together?” Niall dug his fingernails into his palms to keep from biting them and sighed.

“You could have told me, Styles.”

“That takes out half the fun,” Harry said with a dimpled grin, starting to walk toward where Zayn was sitting. Niall followed grudgingly and sat beside Harry, Addy coming over to sit on his lap and watch as Louis and his team practiced.

Harry talked quietly with Zayn most of the time, but he only seemed to be getting one or two word answers. He turned away, dissatisfied, and started to say something to Niall, but the blond sent him a withering look and he shut his mouth. After exactly two minutes and forty three seconds (Niall counted), Harry stood, took Addy’s hand, and started dancing with her on the side of the field, singing one of his songs. Addy giggled and stood on his toes so he could dance her around.

“She alright?” Zayn asked, moving to sit next to Niall. “Lou said she was sick.” Niall nodded. “You didn’t tell me, I would’ve brought her some of my mum’s cooking.”

Niall glanced at him, pursing his lips, but Zayn was carefully avoiding his gaze. Niall pressed his fist to his lips and leaned on his elbow, watching Addy as Harry switched to a faster song. “We just stayed in and watched the tv the whole time, is all,” Niall said. “Louis asked if I wanted to bring her to a practice but I told him no cause she was sick.” Silence fell between them, thick and awkward, and Niall scrubbed his face before saying, “You wanna talk about it?"

“There’s nothing to talk about,” Zayn said. Niall dragged his eyes back to Zayn’s face, but he was watching Addy. “I was just… feeling off.” Niall snorted and had to keep himself from laughing.

“Fuck, you’re still an awful liar,” he told Zayn. The other man finally looked at him. “Look, you had your reason for trying to kiss me and I had my reason for not letting you. We can be big boys about it, can’t we?” Zayn slouched down in his seat and Niall mimicked him. “Now, are you gonna talk to me, or should I talk to myself?”

After a few seconds, Niall contemplating if he really should just start talking, Zayn said, “Fuck, Niall, I don’t know.” He covered his face with his hands. “I guess I’ve just been getting mixed signals, and I know fuck-all about them and I always have. I saw you again and everything hurt, so much more than it did the other boys, and being around you makes me feel fucking good and I just…” He groaned. “I got a little bold and I didn’t think you’d reject me.”

“Cause you’re too pretty, that it, Malik?” Niall said, a teasing tone to his voice. Zayn peeked through his hand to give Niall a glare, causing the blond to laugh. His eyes went to Addy, watching as Louis raced off field to pull her up and into a hug. He smiled fondly at the sight of her giggling face. “I didn’t want you to kiss me because I don’t know that I’m comfortable with you being around yet, Zayn,” he said after a while. Zayn dropped his hands to look at Niall. “I mean, I get it, you promised you weren’t going to leave again, but I’m not some stupid sixteen year old kid thinking the world’s gonna work for me all the time like it used to.”

He looked back at Zayn again, at the pained look on his face. “What happened, happened, and it might be in the past but it’s still something I have to learn from. I don’t want to throw myself into something, and fall head over heels, just for it to fall apart because one of us isn’t feeling too hot.” Zayn sat up straight, but let Niall continue. Niall looked back at Addy. “I have to be sure that it’ll work. I’m not just living life for me, anymore.”

Zayn’s gaze went to Addy and he nodded slowly, his arm brushing against Niall’s. “Let me prove it to you,” he told Niall after a while. “Give me a chance to show you that I’m better, now.” His hand slipped into Niall’s, tentatively interlocking their fingers together, and Niall didn’t pull away. They continued to watch Addy as the practice broke up and the team started doting on her.

“Okay,” Niall said finally. Zayn’s fingers squeezed his lightly as Harry bounced back to them, a wide smile on his dimpled face.

“Are you guys better now?” he asked. “That one didn’t even need me at all!” Niall chuckled softly, looking up at him. Zayn was standing and pulling out of his grip as Niall heard Addy yell out in pain, and as he stood, his eyes finding her quickly, Zayn was already making his way toward her.

“It’s okay, little duck,” he told her as she pulled her scraped knee to her chest. He scooped her up and pulled her to his chest in one smooth motion, examining the scrape as Niall made his way over.

“Got some neosporin in the locker room,” Louis mumbled before he turned and hurried into it. Zayn was whispering gently to Addy, asking if anything else hurt. She sniffled and shook her head.

“What happened, Addy?” Niall asked, glaring around at Louis’ teammates. They shuffled their feet and didn’t meet his gaze.

“Someone tried to kick the ball,” she sniffled, “but they kicked my foot instead and I fell.” Niall pushed the hair from her forehead as Zayn turned his head to tell off the player who’d hit Addy. He apologized quickly as Niall took the neosporin from Louis and applied it to Addy’s knee gently. Addy cried out, and Zayn hushed her gently.

“It’s okay, little duck,” he told her. She wrapped her arms around his neck and hugged him tight. “I think maybe your da should take you home, and let your knee rest.” He tickled her side gently. “You’ve got a big injury, like the big footie players.” She giggled and withdrew, looking up at Zayn.

“I’m okay now.” She turned to Niall. “Da, can I stay?” Niall’s fingers were in his mouth without him realizing, and he pulled them away quickly and nodded. Zayn set her down and she walked over to the player who tripped her, punched him in the stomach, and raced off with the ball between her feet. The other players chuckled and ran after her, while he apologized again to Niall and went to join them.

Niall turned to Zayn and smiled slightly. “You must’ve saw that coming, you were so quick.” Zayn smiled sheepishly.

“Wasn’t fast enough to stop it, though.” Louis clapped Zayn on the back and went to join the others, reminding everyone repeatedly to keep their feet away from Addy’s legs. Harry was still standing by where they were sitting, and he smiled at Zayn as they walked back.

“You’re already acting like a dad to her,” he said. Zayn punched his arm and Harry grabbed it, frowning at him. “Hey, what was that for?”

“Because she has a dad,” Zayn said. Niall smiled slightly as he sat.

“Yeah, but you notice that she calls the rest of us Uncles. Except Liam, but we all know why.” Niall laughed slightly, keeping his gaze on Addy. “She told me she saw you kiss her daddy, you know.” Niall’s eyes went to Harry, who was giving a dimpled smile to Zayn, whose face had flushed.

“Well,” was all Zayn managed, giving a look to Niall that he returned before turning to look at Addy again.

Harry sat next to them, smiling smugly.

++

Zayn was trying to warm Niall up to the idea of them as a couple, but Niall was having a hard go of it.

The most drastic change was that Zayn was always around. He was always inviting Niall somewhere, or showing up with a new toy for Addy.  Addy loved the attention, but Niall was feeling crowded. Zayn was careful not to push his boundaries, never going farther than a kiss on the cheek or a brief moment of holding Niall’s hand, but it was beginning to feel like too much with Addy always around.

Harry begged and begged Niall to let him take Addy for the weekend, and while Niall was a little wary of letting Addy stay with Harry alone, he agreed. Harry picked her up early Saturday morning, swearing on his life that he’d be very careful and Addy would eat only the best foods and be in bed by eight o’clock. Niall smiled and shooed him off and sat on the couch, resting his head back.

After a few minutes of enjoying the silence, Niall decided that he didn’t really care for being on his own. He already missed Addy.

He stood and started to clean. As he was starting to dust, his phone rang, and he picked it up without looking at the ID.

Zayn’s voice rang out loud and clear. “Hey Ni,” he said. His voice was a little muffled, and Niall could picture him holding the phone between his ear and his shoulder. “You busy tonight?”

“All clear,” Niall told him. “For better or worse, Harry’s got Addy for the night.” Zayn chuckled. “Why, what’s up?”

“Figured we could talk some more about our characters,” Zayn said. “Maybe get a bite to eat somewhere?”

Niall considered that for a few minutes. “How about you bring some take-out, and we’ll talk about it?”

“You got it,” Zayn said. “I’ll be there around seven?” Niall agreed and the call ended. He glanced around his living room, debating whether he should keep cleaning or shower.

He managed to clean the bulk of his apartment and shower before Zayn got there. Zayn arrived, looking as sharp as ever, freshly shaved and smelling like cigarettes and firewood. He smiled at Niall as he let him in, holding up the bag of take-out. Niall grinned and took it to the kitchen, grabbing plates to split the food onto.

Zayn seated himself on the couch as he waited, one leg tucked under him. “I was thinking,” he called to Niall, “our characters are supposed to like, fall in love, right?”

“Kinda,” Niall called back, grabbing forks and making his way to Zayn. Zayn took his plate, expression thoughtful.

“But why? I mean, they get pretty close to each other. And Wyatt essentially bares his soul to Connor. But that’s not really grounds to fall in love, right?” Niall listened intently as Zayn declared his hypothesis and essay, each point carefully dissected. Niall couldn’t help the grin that spread across his face as he listened to Zayn talk.

Their serious talk about their character’s feelings for each other fell into throwing pieces of fortune cookie at each other to try and catch it in their mouths. Niall giggled as the piece of fortune cookie he threw at Zayn bounced off the corner of Zayn’s mouth and fell into his lap. Zayn joined his giggles, stuffing the cookie bit into his mouth.

Niall bit into his cookie and stared at Zayn thoughtfully. After a few seconds, Zayn looked up and caught his gaze. “What?” he asked.

“Why’d you get that tattoo?” he asked. Zayn’s eyebrow quirked. “The barcode, with my X-factor audition number on it.” Zayn paused, fingers reaching back to touch the tattoo in question.

After a few seconds he said, “It was something you said you always wanted, right?” Niall bit his lip. “A barcode tattoo.” He chuckled to himself. “You probably still haven’t gotten anything.” Niall shook his head no and Zayn went on. “I just… wanted to have that connection with you. Me and the other boys, we all have tattoos. I have something of them and they have something of me. And I just wanted to have something of you too.”

Niall stared at him, fortune cookie forgotten in his hand, and Zayn smiled sheepishly. “I should’ve asked you about it, but I wasn’t sure you’d be on board with it.”

“It’s fine,” Niall mumbled. His gaze fell to Zayn’s neck, where he could see the very corner of the barcode. “Kinda romantic.” He smacked Zayn’s arm then and Zayn cried out, grabbing his arm where Niall had smacked him. “That’s for getting a tattoo about me when you weren’t even talking to me!”

Zayn chuckled softly. “I deserved that.”

++

Niall had thought that Rich had been lying or exaggerating about the choking scene.

Except that he hadn’t been, and the shooting for that scene was _that day._

It had been several weeks since Louis’ practice when Niall and Zayn had decided to give whatever-it-was a try, and their “dates” had mostly consisted of shared dinners at Niall’s apartment with Addy. Niall wasn’t going to lie and say that he didn’t want their short kisses as Zayn left to be more, it was just that there was Addy to think of, and he had been very explicit in the ‘taking it slow’ category of their discussion about whatever-it-was.

Right now, though, he was beginning to regret not talking to Zayn about it beforehand.

Ailene had stated she wanted to go through the whole scene in one take, so there was no room for mess-ups and no option to just record _that one part_ and then record all the other parts around it. If something went wrong, the whole scene would have to be done again.

So there Niall was, sitting in his character’s room at his character’s work, getting ready to give his character’s subtextual boyfriend a speech and then get choked out for it.

“After this we’ll shoot the final scenes where you need the bruise make-up,” Ailene was telling him. “There’ll be one or two more scenes we’ll shoot with Zayn in them, but mostly you’ll be shooting with the others.” Niall nodded, glancing at the stylist as they fixed up Zayn. He was meant to look disheveled and rushed, and Niall caught himself admiring the fact that even when he was meant to purposely look awful he still looked amazing.

“Here is where the subtext thickens,” Ailene was telling him. Niall looked back at her. “So you really have to convey without words how your character is supposed to feel about his and vice versa.”

“What’s up with the subtext?” Niall asked suddenly. She stopped abruptly, then started laughing. Niall smiled slightly. “I mean, why are you doing this like this? Why not be outright with it, or not at all?”

She hummed thoughtfully, eyes traveling toward Zayn. “I don’t want romance to be the forefront of this movie, you know?” Her hands clasped together. “I mean, it’s a great concept, and Lord knows we need it. But also I’m so tired of everything being about romance. We need some new tropes. This is about the thrill.”

“So everything else is less important?” he asked her. She smiled and nodded.

“Exactly.” He chuckled as Zayn started toward set, his clothes looking properly off-kilter. He sent Niall a sly smile that made Niall blank for a second.

“Reporting for duty,” he said to Ailene with a mock salute. She laughed slightly and motioned for him to get behind the door.

The scene was supposed to end with Zayn rushing back out of the door after he nearly chokes out Niall. Niall was to give some long speech about knowing that Zayn’s the killer and if Zayn doesn’t stop he’ll have no choice but to turn him in, at which point Zayn attacks him, comes to his senses and runs off. They’d already shot the next scene, which was Zayn’s character stalking Niall’s inside his own home the same night, ready to strike, but never doing it. This was the last scene they’d shoot before Niall’s character turned in Zayn’s.

The beginning of the scene went by smoothly. Niall was able to recite his lines clearly, despite the looks Zayn kept giving him to try and throw him off.

The choking scene was a little off.

Ailene cried cut and Zayn buried his face in Niall’s neck.

“Don’t make me move,” he whispered. Niall’s face flushed.

“Not a good time, Malik,” he mumbled.

“Fuck, I fucking know, Niall,” Zayn responded. His harsh words were followed by him pressing down against Niall, who mumbled out a curse, his hands going to Zayn’s sides.

“Sorry,” Niall called out loudly. “He forgot his lines.” Ailene yelled something back and called for a break but Niall had blanked again because Zayn was rolling his hips against him and this was really, really not the right kind of place for that. “You’re killing me,” he whispered. Zayn made a strangled sound. “Think of dead puppies or something.”

Zayn laughed abruptly, burying his face in Niall’s neck. “I’m trying,” was all he said.

“We’ll take care of it later,” Niall mumbled. “Okay? Just, fuck, I don’t know, think of your gran naked and get off.” His face flamed and Zayn pulled back slightly to give him a look. “I meant of me. Get off of me.”

Zayn just laughed again and after a few seconds he pulled away. “That was definitely a mood killer.”

“Being in public isn’t?” Niall grumbled, then smacked Zayn’s arm when he shook his head no. “Can you manage it this time?”

“I think I can,” he said. “Thinking about getting off to my gran really helps.” Niall smacked his arm again and Zayn laughed loudly.

“Love fest over?” Ailene said, standing directly in front of them. Both of them jumped and looked up at her, guilty looks on their faces. “Myra will kill you if you fuck in her clothes.”

“Ailene,” Niall admonished.

“Who said we’d have them on?” Zayn responded. Niall smacked his arm for the third time, but Ailene just laughed.

“Get back in position, boys,” she said, turning to go back to her spot behind the cameras. “And no sex on set.” Niall groaned as Zayn went back to his starting place, laughing. Niall took a deep breath, trying to keep himself on track for the scene. After a minute or so, Ailene cried action.

The scene went a little smoother that time, but Niall couldn’t help but think about the fact that Zayn had gotten turned on, and as he was supposed to be choking Niall, the blond lifted his hand to Zayn’s neck, then trailed down his chest a little.

“Fuck,” Zayn said, before he pulled back, eyes wild. Niall wasn’t even sure if he was acting anymore.

Zayn’s jaw worked, and then he was racing out of the fake office and the scene was called.

Everyone was quiet, and Ailene walked up to Niall as Zayn poked his head around the set wall and made his way over. “That was a nice touch,” she said. “Unscripted,” she said with a pointed look at Zayn, who looked away sheepishly, “but a nice touch. I think we can keep it in there and still keep the rating.” She glanced back at her crew, then at Niall and Zayn. “I don’t think we need that scene anymore. You boys are free to go.”

Niall nodded and stood, glancing at Zayn, who gave him a tense look and started toward wardrobe. Niall followed.

“Sorry,” Zayn said when Niall walked up to him, pulling off the shirt he’d been given for the scene. Niall shook his head.

“I think Ailene was impressed,” he told him, and Zayn sighed exasperatedly.

“I mean about the,” he made a vague gesture downward. Niall snorted slightly. “We haven’t talked about it.”

“No,” Niall agreed, before he pressed Zayn against the wall, brushing his lips over Zayn’s collarbone and neck. “But it’s okay.” Zayn took in a deep breath and Niall pulled away, grinning, and continued changing back into his day clothes. Zayn mumbled a curse at him and changed quickly. When they were both ready to go, Zayn took Niall’s hand and dragged him outside and to his car, pressing him against it and kissing him hungrily. Niall hummed, smiling slightly, and pulled away after a few seconds.

“Got forever until Addy’s ready to get out of school.” Zayn opened the door to Niall’s car for him.

“Meet you at my place?” he asked, pressing kisses down Niall’s neck.

“Yeah,” Niall responded, kissing Zayn quickly and climbing into his car. He followed Zayn to his home and smiled when Zayn stepped up to him, kissing him slowly, dragging his teeth over Niall’s bottom lip. Niall gave a short sigh as Zayn pulled him inside and to his room.

Zayn pressed him against the wall and paused, lips hovering over Niall. Niall looked up to meet his gaze. “I want to do it right,” Zayn said, voice so soft Niall could barely hear him. His hands wrapped over Niall’s neck, pulling him into a slow kiss, and Niall took one of his hands and pressed it to his back.

“I like being touched here,” he dragged Zayn’s hand down over the curve of his bum, “and here,” then he moved it to the inside of his thigh, “and here.” Zayn’s hand rubbed against him slightly through his jeans, making his breath catch. Zayn pulled him into a heavier kiss.

The kiss was followed up by Zayn removing Niall’s clothes and pulling him to the bed. Niall threaded his fingers through Zayn’s carefully messed up hair as Zayn used his mouth and hands to explore Niall’s body.

Zayn worked his way back up to Niall’s mouth and whispered, “What do you want me to do?” Niall looked up at him, at the way he waited, lips plump from kissing Niall til they had no breath. Zayn kissed him slowly, then moved back down. Niall propped himself up on his elbows to watch as Zayn took him in hand and gave him a few strokes before wrapping his lips around his tip.

A short, breathy moan left Niall’s lips as Zayn took him slowly, going down until Niall hit the back of his throat. His hair fell into his face and Niall moved it out of the way, making Zayn look up at him through his eyelashes as his head started to bob.

Niall would forever deny that it only took a bit of that to make him come.

Zayn kissed him slowly, smiling smugly, and Niall groaned softly, covering his face. Zayn chuckled softly and bat Niall’s hand away when he pulled at his belt.

“It’s okay,” he said when Niall started to protest. “We still have a lot to talk about, and you have to pick up Addy in a bit.” Niall glanced at the clock briefly, then at Zayn, who grinned and kissed him slowly. “But the next time I expect you to last longer.” Niall groaned again and covered his face.

++

Niall was curled up with Addy on the couch when Zayn walked in, bags of groceries in his hand. Niall looked up, eyebrow raised, and Zayn blew him a kiss and walked into the kitchen.

“I’m making dinner,” he said loud enough for Niall to hear him. Addy gasped and ran to the kitchen.

“Can I help?” Niall heard her ask.

“Yes, but your da can’t come in, okay?” Zayn mock-whispered. Addy nodded solemnly and turned to give Niall a stern look, and he laughed.

“Okay, okay, not like I was planning to move any time soon anyway.” Addy smiled and turned around, bouncing off to help Zayn with whatever he was doing. Niall gave a soft sigh and turned back to the telly.

Several hours, fifteen curse words, and three belly grumbles later, Zayn appeared in the doorway, covered in flour. Niall laughed at the sight, standing when Zayn stepped over and took his hand and silenced him with a kiss. He tried and miserably failed to hold back giggles as Zayn led him back into the kitchen, where Addy was doing jazz-hands at the table.

Niall’s giggles trailed off as he took in the feast before him, all surrounding a cake with poor helpings of frosting on top. Zayn’s fingers squeezed his and Niall looked up at him.

“I felt bad we spent all that time filming on your birthday,” he said gently. “And of course you didn’t make a big deal out of it and probably forgot it was your own birthday.” Niall blushed because okay, it wasn’t like it happened often, but what was the point in making a big deal out of his birthday anyway? Zayn just gave a soft laugh.

He pulled out a chair and beckoned for Niall to sit. Addy sat next to him, grinning, as Zayn began to serve them. Her hands reached for the cake and he bat them away. “That’s for dessert, little duck,” he told her sternly. She pouted at him and Niall laughed.

“Zayn’s right, princess,” he said, pressing a kiss to her forehead. “You’ve got to eat all your food.”

Half of the cake went into the fridge when they were done and Niall told Addy to go get dressed for her footie practice. She kissed his cheek, then Zayn’s, and bounced off into her room.

“Why’s Louis taking her?” Zayn asked as he picked at his last helping of cake.

“He likes to show off,” Niall said with a laugh. Zayn nodded, like that was perfectly usual Louis behavior. “Likes the looks everyone gets when they see a real footie star arriving to drop his niece off at practice.”

“I’m sure everyone’s star struck.”

“Half the mothers always ask where the rest of the band is,” Niall said with a chuckle. “Always throws him for a loop.” He forked the last bit of his piece of cake into his mouth and stood, gathering the plates and taking them to the sink.

“Niall -” Zayn started.

“You cook, so I clean,” Niall told him as he began rinsing off the plates. “You can put them in the washer, eh?” Zayn finished his piece of cake and walked over, hip checking him as he opened the dishwasher. Niall smiled and began handing him the rinsed off dishes.

“I’m surprised,” Niall said after a while, causing Zayn to look up at him, “that I’m the only one with a kid. I honestly thought Liam or Harry would’ve had one first.” Zayn hummed.

“Liam definitely,” he said after a moment. “But he’s having a kid now, yeah?” Niall nodded. “At least you won’t be the only one.” Niall smiled slightly, starting to rinse out the pots and pans. “What do you think it will be?”

“A boy, definitely,” Niall said. “He’ll have Liam’s hair.”

“Hopefully Sophia’s kidneys,” Zayn said jokingly. Niall snorted and hip checked Zayn.

“I’m ready Da!” Addy yelled just as the doorbell rang. Zayn ambled off to get it.

“Oh ho ho!” Niall heard Louis yell. He winced. “Now you’re answering his door, huh? How long ‘til you move in then?”

Niall moved into the hallway and hissed, “Louis, shut up.” Louis grinned at him and turned to Addy, who ran over. He picked her up and smiled at her.

“Ready for practice, love?” She nodded.

“Be good,” Niall said, pressing a kiss to her cheek. She smiled and waved and Louis carried her outside. Zayn closed the door behind them and Niall smiled sheepishly. “Sorry.”

Zayn chuckled softly and kissed Niall lightly before moving back to the kitchen to finish the dishes. “Can’t apologize for Louis being Louis.” Niall followed, but there was nothing left for him to clean. Zayn turned and pulled him close by the hips, smiling at Niall’s expression. “Think I know you well enough to clean everything the way you like it, yeah?” Niall chuckled and kissed him.

“Dating you was probably the best decision of my life.” Zayn’s face lit up.

“Really?”

“No.” He laughed at the way Zayn’s expression fell. “I think auditioning for X-factor was the best decision of my life. It helped me meet you and have the best ten years of my life.” Zayn’s eyebrows meshed together as he counted in his head, making Niall laugh again. “I’m rounding up.”

Zayn rolled his eyes. “Love it when you get all mathematical on me,” he joked, pressing another kiss to Niall’s lips.

++

Niall and Zayn’s first official outing as a couple was at the party Liam and Sophia threw to announce they were having a baby.

Addy bounced in, wearing a pastel purple dress and frilly heels, and Niall followed, Zayn’s fingers interlocked loosely with his. He was chewing slightly on his fingers, but no one noticed or, if they did, they didn’t say anything.

Addy pranced up to Liam, all smiles and dimples. As soon as he saw her he smiled and picked her up in a hug, twirling her around and kissing her on the cheek and making her blush and giggle. Niall smiled fondly as he stepped up and congratulated Sophia, who smiled and thanked him.

“You excited to have a cousin, Ad?” Liam was asking her. She nodded and he glanced at Niall. “We found out what it is.”

Niall’s face lit up and he moved closer. “What is it?” Liam gave him a serious look, which soon split into a grin and a giggle.

“I was going to say that you’ll have to wait, but I can’t hold it in,” he said, his grin spreading to Niall and Zayn, who was listening intently. “It’s gonna be a boy.”

“I called it,” he said, turning to Zayn, who nodded.

“You did,” he said with an affectionate smile. Liam chuckled and they watched as Zayn was pulled away by Harry. Niall felt Liam’s hand brush his side and he looked up, taking in the careful way Liam was regarding him.

“What’s going on there?” he asked as he set Addy down and started to lead Niall through to the kitchen, where a few glasses of wine and champagne and a cake sat. Niall studied it as he tried to decide what exactly to say to get Liam to stop looking at him like that.

“It’s alright,” he said after a few moments, looking up at Liam. Niall gave him an assuring smile. “It’s not a rash decision, or anything. We’ve talked a lot about it, about us, and about Addy and how it might affect her.” He glanced out of the kitchen, spying Zayn laughing with Harry and Gemma. He smiled slightly. “I really think it’s gonna be fine.”

“He cares about you,” Liam said with certainty. “But what about your schedules? Are you okay with that?”

Niall couldn’t help his small smile, and he turned to Liam and said, “You don’t have to worry about me, Liam. I’m a big kid now.”

Liam bit his lip. “I know, but I do.” Niall rubbed his arm and turned back away. “I can’t help looking out for you.”

Niall glanced at Liam and smiled. “I know, but I’ve got it this time.” He rubbed Liam’s arm again. “Thank you.” Liam gave him a soft ‘you’re welcome’ and watched as Niall walked back out to Zayn, who was now holding Addy.

Niall brushed his lips over Zayn’s cheek and asked Addy if she was thirsty. Before he could head back to get her a drink, Liam came back out with the cake, smile so large his eyes had turned into crescent moons. Everyone clapped when they cut the cake to reveal blue candy in the middle.

“So cheesy,” Zayn whispered in his ear, causing Niall to giggle. He looked up and caught Liam’s gaze. The other was smiling widely at him, eyes crescent moons. Niall smiled back at him.

++

Niall was tired and irritated and he really wanted to soak his feet.

He’d been standing around set for twelve hours, trekking across rough gravel for the scene he’d been shooting. The movie had seemed interesting when he first got the script, but he hadn’t realized there would be so much walking involved.

Or that there would be days like today, where he couldn’t go and pick up his daughter from school.

He’d asked Zayn to pick her up, since Harry was on tour and Liam was busy at work. Zayn had placated him with millions of texts saying that everything was fine and Addy was happy to go home with him. He didn’t even text to make sure what Addy was and wasn’t allowed to eat, and Niall hoped that was a good thing.

He arrived home at eight thirty, scrubbing his face and wondering if Zayn remembered Addy’s bedtime was eight o clock. He let himself in, about to call out when he spotted Zayn and Addy sleeping on the couch, breathing in sync.

He smiled softly, slipping off his shoes and moving into his room to change into sweats. When he walked back into the living room, Addy blinked open her eyes and smiled sleepily at him.

“Welcome home Da,” she mumbled.

“Let’s get you to bed,” he said gently. She opened her arms and he picked her up, smiling softly as she wrapped her arms around his neck and nuzzled against him. “Did you have a good day?” he asked her gently as he carried her to her room.

She nodded. “Zayn’s fun. He took me to my practice and all the mommies loved him.” Niall chuckled and tucked her into bed. She rubbed her eyes and looked up at him. “Da?”

“Yes princess?”

She yawned and asked, “Do you love Zayn?” Niall paused, blinking in surprise, but Addy went on. “I love Zayn. I want him to stay.”

Niall smiled and nodded, “Me too.” She nuzzled into her pillow and fell back to sleep. Niall brushed the hair out of her face and stood, moving back into the living room. Zayn was stretching and yawning on the couch.

“Hey duck,” he said as Niall laid next to him, smiling slightly. Niall wrapped an arm around Zayn’s waist and rested his forehead against Zayn’s chest. “How was filming?” Niall made a disgusted noise in the back of his throat.

“I’m not gonna do another movie for five years,” he mumbled. Zayn laughed, rubbing his side. He tilted his head back and brushed his lips over Zayn’s jaw, smiling at the stubble there. “When’s the last time you shaved?”

Zayn shrugged. “Few days. Wanted to give the rough style another go.” Niall rubbed his fingers against the stubble and Zayn shifted to press a kiss to his fingers.

“I love you,” Niall said, voice quiet. He shocked himself quiet and Zayn looked up at him, eyes widened slightly. After a few seconds, Niall smiled and kissed Zayn quickly. “I do, I love you.”

Zayn smiled back, nose scrunching up slightly, and he kissed Niall again.

“I love you too.”

\--

**Epilogue:**

Niall fixed his suit jacket and glanced at Zayn, whose hands were clasped together. Zayn smiled encouragingly at him and said, “Don’t worry, Ni, everything’s gonna be fine.” Niall nodded and scratched at his forehead. “It’s not like it used to be, they don’t mob us anymore.”

Niall smiled at that and rested his head back against the headrest. “I just haven’t been to a big premiere in a while.” Zayn reached over to take his hand.

“This is your movie,” he said with a smile. “Everyone’s gonna love it and you.”

“It’s our movie,” Niall told him. “This wouldn’t be anything without us.” Zayn smiled.

“Yeah, okay, you sap.” Niall chuckled and the limo pulled to a stop in front of the red carpet. Zayn pushed him gently and Niall climbed out, hesitating as he took in the paparazzi and large gathering of twenty-somethings and mothers screaming for his attention.

He glanced back as Zayn stepped out of the limo and the screams got louder. He smiled and waved at the crowd of screaming women and his other hand settled on the small of Niall’s back, gently guiding him onward, passed the screaming women and onto the bulk of the carpet where they posed for pictures.

Ailene stepped up to them, grinning widely. “Where’s Addy?” she asked Niall.

“She’s staying with Liam for the night,” he told her. “I figured that they could use some experience.” Zayn gave a short laugh and stepped aside to pose for more pictures. Niall watched him, smiling small.

“Things are still going well?” Ailene asked as she posed with Niall for a picture. Niall ducked his head.

“Things are perfect,” he told her. She gave him an encouraging smile.

“If he hurts you or Addy I’ll ruin his career.” Niall burst into laughter and Ailene patted him on the back before making her way inside. Zayn stepped over, eyebrows raised, and Niall pressed his lips to Zayn’s cheek in a mock whisper before leading the way inside. The doors closed behind them.

“What was so funny?” Zayn asked.

“Ailene being over-protective,” Niall said with a smile.  Zayn’s eyebrows meshed together, but Niall pressed his finger to his lips in a shushing gesture and nodded toward where Ailene was giving her speech about the movie.

They were seated and the movie began, and Zayn’s hand made its way into Niall’s lap. At first he was simply playing with Niall’s fingers, but right around the choking scene he started drawing patterns on the inside of Niall’s thigh.

Niall batted at his hand, fighting a smile, and whispered, “Don’t, Zayn, we still have the afterparty.” Zayn grinned at him, but his fingers continued. Niall took his hand, holding it in a vice-grip. Zayn turned his attention back to the movie, smiling smugly.

The movie received a standing ovation. Niall grinned and turned to Zayn, who was watching him with a fond smile. He kissed Niall quickly, just before the lights went up, and said, “I told you that you were amazing.”

Niall blushed and stood as they ushered the cast out of the theater and toward the hall where the after party was being held. Everyone was chatting happily, but Niall was hyper-conscious of the way Zayn’s hands were tracing patterns on his back.

They separated upon entering the hall, thanking everyone who had contributed and being thanked by everyone else. Niall kissed Ailene on the cheek and hugged her, thanking her repeatedly, but she just waved a hand at him.

“I’ll be calling you for my next project, so keep your schedule open,” she said with a grin. Niall laughed and felt a tug on his jacket. He turned to find Zayn, who smiled slightly and pulled him away from Ailene, who waved and turned back to her husband.

“Now that we’ve talked to everyone,” Niall muttered as they stepped away from the loud crowd, “we can get out of here.” Zayn raised his eyebrows and Niall grinned. “Addy’s staying with Liam for the night…"

Zayn laughed softly and pressed a slow kiss to Niall’s lips. “Niall Horan,” he whispered, faking shock, “are you suggesting what I think you’re suggesting?

“I’m suggesting quite a lot of things,” Niall said, wiggling his eyebrows. Zayn laughed again.

“Well then, lead the way.”


End file.
